Drinking Koolaid by the Campfire

Okay, now that we still have Australia showing up on the map after the May 21 hysteria I think it’s safe to say we told you so. I am really amazed at the aspect of the frenzy and it’s media coverage. You would have thought Micheal Jackson was resurrected. Many people on Facebook and blogs have written about such things, and also ripped into the community of Christians and any other company of people with faith. That’s fine. We still love them and we love their dogs too.

We all had a bit of fun about it. I had friends that did a great joke and put their clothes at their desk so when their boss came in the “joke” was on him who would be left behind...yet he was one to play into the May 21st stuff. We’ve heard the crazy stories of people selling up and doing it tough in the RV and spreading the Word...at $4 bucks a gallon in a gas guzzlin’ mobile home. I’ve always wanted to go cross country in an RV..but I can’t afford the gas. We tragically also have heard about the women who killed her own children and then took her own slice out of life with her knife. Earlier this year,we’ve got the Koran burning pastor in Florida and more skeletons in our doctrinal closet will be found and so...I could go on and on about stories like this. There are two things that I think of by the way when I hear the words Camping and Kool Aid. Jim Jones and David Koresh. I personally think we should change to lemonade in our church...I hate red punch for this reason. It just wigs me out. Stories like these and the media frenzy do not paint anyone with faith in a good light let alone a person of faith that actually believes in the return of Christ for that matter and makes me look like a lunatic to the world. But again, that’s fine. Even Jesus’ own brothers didn’t believe in him as the Messiah during his ministry on earth.

I feel for the families that have put so much of their hope in a feeble person such as Mr. Camping. I feel for Mr. Camping who at his ripe old age is scratching his head and going back to the drawing board on his life’s work...and all for nothing. Dude...your not that special that God is going to give you the time and the day of His coming before he lets Jesus know. This is just a very self centered way of thinking and it actually is not living out any aspect of faith. In the meantime, Family Radio has accumulated 80 million dollars worth of donations. They are rolling in it like the money machine. You heard me...80 MILLION DOLLARS (said with Mr. Evil’s pinky voice) This man Camping is a charlatan, a medicine man and a false prophet. Do you know if in the Old Testament that if some one's prophecies didn’t come to 100% fruition they were stoned to death? YIKES!! That’s how high the expectation was for the position and not exactly a sign on bonus to encourage people to ascribe to that position. According to the Old Testament law of Moses, Howard Camping is basically a false prophet and deserves to die and this actually is what many even worldly people out there think he should get. What do we do as people of faith with the likes of a false prophet in our midst? It kinda says what God does with someone who is a false prophet.... it somewhere in the end....of the...Bible and it doesn’t look pretty....lots of fire and stuff...let’s move on.

Well, I have come to know the only way your going to know truth from fiction is by not just knowing the truth...but LOVING the truth. There are so many other aspects to faith than what has been displayed with the latest American Prophet reality show we’ve just seen. What about selling all our possessions and giving it to the poor? What about loving your enemies? How about loving God? What about loving each other? What about taking care of the most vulnerable in our society to loneliness and depression or children with AID/HIV in Africa? What about spending that money to help the people of Haiti or Japan or help the south with all it’s floods? What about making disciples of Christ? I’ve seen pictures of these families that have bought into this movement and they look like a typical American family. A family on vacation not a mission trip to Africa.

So now that it’s May 22...now what? Maybe the likes of Mr. Camp will not be that appealing. Maybe they will dig deep themselves into scripture and discover what God really wants them to do until His return. It might look a lot different that what they expected if they look at what the Bible literally says. God still loves them just like he loves the people who made fun of them, mocked them and called them crazy. (Even ME) To live a life of faith is letting go and letting God handle the rest of the big stuff like the “end of the world” . What will the of the world look like according to what God promises? I know this, He promises never to leave us nor forsake us...he will and does make ALL THINGS NEW. He created all things, and sustains all things. He is the one on the Throne, not our feeble minded ideas of who He is. Faith is a HOPE, not a curse. This is what I count on as a person of faith. There are many many theological aspects to living a life of faith and my life looks nothing, nothing like this typical American family that bought into a false teaching. It seems like if people sold everything they own to ride around in a $50,000 RV and guzzle gas, leave their children, leave spouses...and in one case...even kill their own children because they thought it was the end of the world that they missed not just the boat...but the point of having faith all together

Couture Closet Cleaning

Sorry I don't have something more catchy like the word "poop" on my blog...obviously I get more readers with words like that! Onto the next subject at hand...spiritual closet cleaning!

As a seasoned fashion designer in my past life I always looked forward to Spring. Here in the Northeast, we’ve had a long long winter and now with the trees blooming, pollen flying around, the season of change certainly is in the air. I used to plan as a designer almost a year in advance, search the trends in the market of fashion and translate them into marketable products. I have to admit, I loved... loved my job. I still have a deep emotional attachment to the seasons and how they evoke certain states of mind in society and how that carries over into something as simple as our culture in the form of dress. My favorite thing about being a designer was watching the trends that I had investigated and researched slowly become reality as people bought certain pieces of clothing and that I had the foreknowledge that floral prints or certain color combos were going to be a major trend in the stores. Everything believe it or not influences things like hem line, silhouette, the type of fabric used, colors, merchandising or a detail like ruffles...right down to the political environment, the movies that win the Oscars, the economy and other real time events.

One of the most important things that prevented me in my job to move ahead mentally and artistically was if I didn’t have a chance to clean out my office after each season that was crazily done to meet deadlines for the manufacturing process. I just simply couldn’t work on spring when the winter collection of whatever I was working on graced the presence of my desk.

I recently did a major cleaning raid of my closet, it is spring cleaning time after all. I had to look at each piece of clothing and in some cases mourn the loss of how wonderful a bargain that outfit was, or how great I looked in that size whatever skirt....as I have put on the post child pounds. My world as a stay at home mom is much different than it was 8 years ago. I no longer need the same kind of wardrobe I had when I worked in an office. I have to admit, I’ve held onto some pieces thinking I’ll return to that world of fashion or a work environment that would have me dress for success. My uniform as a Mom is different. Yoga pants, jeans, sneakers or shoes that enable me to chase after my 3 kids in the mud are more suitable for my current job and the accessories are more in line with duffle bag than a Coach clutch.

I still can’t move forward menality without cleaning the closets every season but it’s amazing how this last clean out contained a third of my closet! Boy, I had high hopes in whatever was in that closet for 8 years. It’s made me think about how important it is to clean our closets out both physically and spiritually. There are some things I personally hold onto in that closet that are simply unused, or that I am holding onto for no good reason at all other than comparing my now life with the past. In scripture there are several references to “putting off” certain attitudes in the hearts like the anger of man, or to “put on” the garments of praise. Dropping your favorite dress that you haven’t worn in a long long time in that pile of "never to wear again" takes a certain resolve over the emotional attachment or even to the reality...”girl you just ain’t gonna fit in that again” rings in my head along with "join weight watchers and you'll look great in that again". If my body changes, trust me...I'm going shopping for new stuff!

I don’t collect a paycheck as I did in the past. Unlike other professionals, my bonus comes in the form of a Mother’s Day surprise as my kids do their best to serve me a breakfast of champions in the form of saltine sandwiches and dates for breakfast, with a card from the heart written in the best miss spelled all capitol letters. On those days, well, lets just say I feel like I got a promotion to CEO of Calvin Klein.

As a Mom though I never went to "mom school" or studied parenting at a big university. I often feel unequipped to handle stuff down the road as many Moms do. I wish I had more foreknowledge however as Mom about the stuff down the road for my own kids good. Trends in society don’t look to great. Especially with that Lady Gaga hatching out of an egg in a meat dress. But I am throwing my old ways to the side and putting on God’s ways of handling the future. Sometimes it’s tough having emotional attachment to things that I’ve stored up in my spiritual closet, especially those not so flattering tendencies that I might occasionally think look or feel great on. So with the coming of a new season- I am giving it to the Salvation Army which is no ironic twist. I lay those garments of shame, pain and hurt at the cross of Christ and put on that pure white custom made for me priestly garment that He has for waiting for me. My reward in this job will not come from the world’s praises of men but in the hope that I was a godly Mom hear "well done" from my heavenly Father. In the meantime, I am still working on that along the way “putting off” those old clothes the world would influence me to wear or that I am so attached to.

What's in your spiritual closet that you could give to the Salvation Army?

Cooking over Poop & Other Strange Disorders

So I could totally write about so many interesting things this week, the day Osama Bin Laden died, Holocaust Remembrance Day, taxes, elections, earthquakes, floods, sex, drugs, and rock and roll. But I will not. I am writing to get something off my chest the subject of kids with ADHD and the high expectation of compliance in society- even in the church community.

You see, what do you do when the expectation of “obedience” is there but your kid just has behavioral issues that are chemical, and genetic and just simply looks disobedient and out of control. Do you beat it out of them? How much of a beating, how much of a time in isolation do you give...over and over and over again? In one breath the spiritual aspects of “obedience” is relevant and obligated, but also as a Mom of three boys with focusing issues, and that word..."distractibility"... I can tell you there are days I feel utterly emotionally defeated by the judgements of other people. My kids are feral even to my standards most days and I feel like sprinkling Ritalin in their cereal but really the reason I want to do that is not for MY benefit...it’s to comply to other’s expectations about how well they should act. I think the church should feel less like the world and be more of a refuge but sadly I think I am not alone in my isolated experience.

I will take this back to a church issue because I clearly posted a picture of Ezekiel bread for a reason. There are kids that sit all lovely and complient, participate in a worship service dressed in khakis and button down shirts and a tie. Lovely. This is not the picture of my family. My estimation is that they did not have an hour battle over “sensory” issues of how the clothing feels in “temperature or softness” that Sunday with all of their children. Now sit those well complient home schooled (I am not knocking homeschooling but drawing a contrast) children next to mine and the comparisons are vast. In the church community, do we see kids that have behavior and learning problems as “disobedient” little scoundrels having parents that simply do not have proper authority over their children? With reality show families like the Duggars that ooze Christian ideals...I think it gives a false expectation on families and what they should "look" like.

Seriously consider how you “judge” other peoples kids and their parents when that hellion is screaming in store or better yet having a freak out in church. Or do we support parents that at the end of the day- make decisions to love, keep the communication lines open, and an extra amount of grace is needed for all to survive...maybe more than what Leviticus demands simply because ADHD did not exist in Biblical times. How you judge that squirmy rambuncsious kid and his mother? I am not negating proper discipline by any means...no way...no how...but I am saying until people have lived with the same kind of issues as mine I would please ask that people refrain from judgement on my parenting perspective or the ability to withstand endurance at the end of the day. The end of the day I want my kids to know that God loves them, even with their feral ways. I mean really... John the Baptist eating locusts wearing sackcloth? Hello people this is not your pew sitting compliant child! Think about what John’s poor mother must have been seen as...well somewhat neglectful. And Ezekiel? Cooking over a pile of poop? My kids so would love to do that in the backyard of our church. And David....dancing naked before the Lord? He made his Father proud, but his cranky wife had a thing or two to say about that.They are going to break rules, push boundaries just like we do in our fleshly ways but I want them to know that they are accepted as they are. The discipline is because I love them, but I also KNOW they need an exorbitant amount of mercy and grace. I get to choose when that is.

I kind of wish the body of faith understood that too sometimes for parents of kids with ADHD. In more than just providing “programs” or Sunday school. The support of someone saying- “I thought I would loose it during those days” or “you are a great Mom and it must be extra difficult with not 1, not 2, but 3 kids with ADD” Some people would say their is no such thing as ADD/ADHD...that kids just need discipline or the father needs to discipline the “right” way not the “wrong” way. The school’s at fault, the kid is at fault or that kids is exposed to way to much violence. I will say this- when you know that your child has ADD because he can’t stop wetting the bed because his hormones are immature, or that he cracks his jaw, neck and cracks his knuckles out of impulse control issues, or has never been able to sit still (even inutero) and is propelled by his own interests over and above anyone else’s, temper tantrums hours long, low self esteem (regardless of how popular he is), high levels of frustration that manifest in feeling and being out of control and indulging his body to act out the frustration in either bodily harm to others (and later in life which we are trying to prevent...himself) or the obsessive tendencies to fight over a tiny lego piece with a sibling. I don’t think the behavior is because little Johnny just didn’t have the proper discipline. What motivates my kid, isn’t what motivates yours. In fact, the play between instant gratification and prolonged gratification while is also insight on our flesh natures while being so true, some of us have more fleshy natures than others. The kids with ADHD just where it on the outside instead of pushing way down somewhere it can't be dealt with. We all struggle with this. Why does one person pop a brownie in their mouth when feeling bad and another take a jog on a track? Motivation and gratification. Some people have learned habits and others have more tendency to have their brains function in a certain way and have mountains to climb to accomplish something like getting out bed. If people can relate to depression in adults within the body of faith (because they have experienced it) and approach that person with a comment like...”wow, you must want to kill yourself at the end of the day...have you tried just counting your blessings and just being happy?” For someone who has a chemical imbalance this is just the encouragement and support they need! NOT!

Prayer, encouragement, something that lifts someone up that says...”God loves you, and you are not alone. God has the power and ability to heal your depression.” For anyone that doesn’t believe in chemical ups and downs....ask a women going through menopause, or a pregnant women, or a women whose just lost a baby, or a women who has PMS or a women who suffers post pardum depression. We don’t point the finger at a women whose lost a baby and say “it must be something you ate” or “just relax and you’ll conceive” when really her body doesn’t produce enough estrogen to hold a pregnancy.

So why all the fuss Lucy2Shoes about ADHD and the church? Well...let’s stop blaming the parents for not keeping their kids “in control” as per the Bible. Let’s not see “obedience” the way it looks for the Duggars as the goal for kids with ADHD. Because essentially not seeing the difficulties of families with kids like this is basically no different than blaming a women for her lack of estrogen or the father for that matter. How about love, mercy and grace so that when kids with ADHD hate themselves because the world has rejected them or they don't meet up with even the church's standards of what "obedience" looks like...that they know a Father that loves them, accepts them for who God created them to be. I mean after all- we wouldn't have Ezekiel bread locust sandwiches cooked over poop without prophets that pushed the envelope at bit now would we?